Woman gives a thank-you to a priest who went the extra mile for her birth mother

(The Criterion has invited our readers to share a special thank-you for someone who has influenced their lives in a positive and powerful way. Here is the fifth part of a continuing series. See part four | See part five)
 

By John Shaughnessy

There are times when someone’s extra efforts make such a difference in a person’s life—which explains why Ann Clute desperately wanted to thank the priest who went the extra mile for her and her birth mother.

In 2019, the then-51-year-old Clute began a search into her past, hoping to learn the circumstances around her adoption, hoping also to find her birth parents and start a relationship with them.

That’s when she learned about the actions and influence of Father Michael Kettron, then a priest in the Diocese of Lafayette in Indiana, at a crucial time in her life.

“It was very early spring in 1967 when you were contacted by my grandparents and their 18-year-old daughter, Carol,” Clute wrote in a letter to the priest. “Carol was unmarried and pregnant with me.

“According to my adoption records, you arranged for Carol to go live with your parents in Cincinnati, Ohio, until she gave birth to me in December. I was born on December 2, 1967, at Bethesda Hospital. My records also indicate that you hand-delivered me to St. Elizabeth’s Home in Beech Grove to await adoption very late at night on December 3.

And you baptized me before you left the agency.”

Clute wrote the letter to Father Kettron near Mother’s Day of 2021, a time when the priest was in the waning months of his life at a nursing home in Beech Grove, a time when there were still restrictions on visits because of the COVID-19 pandemic.

“I have been told that you were a good friend of the family, and thus it explains the extra effort that you took to assist them in their crisis,” Clute continued in her letter. “I would also enjoy hearing about your parents. They must have been especially wonderful people to have taken in a young girl for six months while she was pregnant.”

Near the end of her letter, Clute wrote, “In the event that we never meet and that this is my one and only communication with you, I would like you to know that I am eternally grateful for all that you did for my mother and my grandparents.

“I believe that you went above and beyond your normal duties to assist my family to protect their reputation. I greatly appreciate your gentle care in safely returning me to St. Elizabeth’s and for making sure that I was baptized before you departed.”

A special Christmas present

Clute didn’t receive a response from Father Kettron, who died at the age of 91 on June 14, 2022. She also didn’t get to reunite with her birth mother who died in 2011.

“I loved her more than she could have ever understood,” Clute said. “And I have never once chastised her for her decision.”

There are also many blessings that continue to make Clute thankful.

She entered into the lives of her adoptive parents, Rex and Carol Myers, on December 20, 1967.

“Mom always talked about what a special Christmas present I was for them that year,” noted Clute, who grew up in Our Lady of the Greenwood Parish in Greenwood and attended school there. “I have always known I was adopted, and my parents made that a very special thing. They were always grateful to have been able to raise children.”

Clute’s life has also been blessed by her two now-grown daughters, Sydney and Lauren. Plus, there’s the anticipation of her first grandchild, due in the spring.

Clute has also connected with her birth father and his sons, plus relatives from her birth mother’s side of the family.

“All in all, my search ended well, and I am thrilled to have found a very large, extended family,” she said. “Both families have welcomed me with open arms.”

Yet, perhaps, the greatest blessing of all is this: Clute has turned all the love she has known in her life into sharing that gift with young women who have chosen to open their hearts to having children.

Making a connection with compassion

For 37 years, Clute has been a registered nurse for Franciscan Health Indianapolis, many of those years working in the maternity unit. She now coordinates the hospital’s Childbirth Education program, teaching expectant parents and helping to prepare them for the life-changing experience of parenthood.

Clute has always felt a special connection to certain patients.

“As a maternity nurse, I have always gravitated to our young moms who are considering adoption, and I go out of my way to care for them with a little extra effort,” Clute noted. “I’ve always wanted to care for them with the extra understanding and compassion that I hoped was shown to my mom when I was born.

“I have been able to speak honestly with girls who were torn about what to do, and I can paint a very pleasant picture of adoption. I always tell them how grateful I am that my mom made that unselfish decision. I tell them that I would not be standing in front of them had it not been for that choice. I express my respect for them.”

She also shares that she understands the difficulty of their choice.

“I tell them that adoption will likely be the hardest decision of their life, but also possibly the most beautiful one ever. I have cried buckets of tears with these moms as I wheel them out the hospital doors empty-handed and heart-breaking. Mine breaks every time for my own mom.

“I always encourage them to write a letter to their baby—explaining the circumstances, explaining how they feel, telling their story, giving their baby a glimpse of themselves and how much they were loved. A letter of explanation is the one thing that I have always wanted and desperately hoped would be in my file.”

Just as she has seen the heartbreak of a mother placing a child for adoption, Clute has also witnessed the joy of that choice.

“I have had the thrill of taking a new baby and placing it in the arms of the excited adoptive parents just hours later,” Clute said. “Nothing compares to that joy. In those moments, I saw what it must have been like for my adoptive parents. I congratulate them and know that the circle is complete.”

All her life experiences led Clute to serve on the advisory council of the St. Elizabeth/Coleman Adoption Agency for many years.

“I was thrilled to be able to give back to the place that gave me so much,” she said. “They have such wonderful staff working there and, of course, I felt very much at home. They had all heard my story countless times, and it was very exciting for all of us when I was able to share my search results with them.”

The results included the extra efforts of a priest who went the extra mile for her and her birth mother. She ended her thank-you letter to him with this thought:

“We rarely fully know the impacts that acts of kindness make on those around us. But in this case, it has left a lasting impact on me.

“Thank you from the bottom of my heart.” †